Ich werde wirklich erschrocken... (this is a big rant guys)

"The Goddess of the Crescent Moon" -By: Christopher Taylor
"Glenn Sueznin-2008" -By: Christopher Taylor
"Point-and-Shoot" -By: Christopher Taylor
(Note: I realize his body is outta proportion. I'll probably fix if its colored)

"Nyomi- Relic Hunting Days" By- Christopher Taylor







I guess when it all comes down to it, figuring out if your really going to make it in life with what you want to do or your passion, is a hard realization. Ever since stopping NEO|ARK, because of bad reviews, mixed messages, and as I can't forget the total ham and cheese sandwich handing of a critique I recieved at the Phoenix Anime Convention in November 2006 by some of TOKYOPOP's editors, I've had this small voice inside telling me "You'll never get anywhere, you'll fail, fly back to New Jersey where you'll stay for the rest of your life serving the youth of tomorrow in their drug infested, kicking over trash cans, robbing and beating elderly people, lighting and blowing things up for "fun", sitting at their mom's house doing nothing for the rest of our lives lifestyle while working at whatever rat infested grocery store or Best Buy or Staples they decide to put up next. And I've fought hard against this thinking. I've thrown myself at any or every job whether or not I've had experience or not, or if I know the program like the back of my hand or whether a bit of training would help me become better. However every company seems to think I'm not worth it. I've spent countless of days and times searching for work, applying, practicing so that I'll be ready for whatever they try to hit me with, going in there and talking with them, explaining to them that despite what handicaps I might face, I want the job and I will learn and grow with the job. But still...nadda. Nothing to call for except some extra art, some 3D work that ranges from bad crap to O.K. animation, and things like that. I want in something. Drawing is life for me. Even forcing myself to stop, somehow I'll always find a way of picking up a pencil and sketching down things. I cannot see myself doing anything else. Anything, not customer service (not anymore), or computers and electronics (tho I probably wouldn't mind for a middle job or something), not food services (never again). I don't know what or how to get this across to the people not hiring me or giving me a shot, because I'll say it now. I am a force to be reckoned with. I've been push down before many time, and gawd-damn it, I'll rise again. So you can throw bills at me for stupid crap, past employers can continue being dicks to me for no reason and trying to weasel money outta me for no good agenda because some way I'll earn money and one day I'll be able to hold onto it instead of paying on loans or whatever stupid ish pops up, Ex-girlfriends that suck, STILL SUCK, because present girlfriend is hella better in so many ways. Friends that run off that I thought had a close bond, don't have to contact me, its ok, because my real friends have stuck with me through everything, and are still here with me now, tho 4000 miles away, and for whatever reason ever, I'll always have my Family, tho sometimes I might come off as a failure in some ways, I know that my determination shines through, and make them proud.


I hate bad dreams.....I hate jobs that don't tell you why your not being hired, or what's wrong with certain submissions handed into them. If they have the time to review it, they have the time to tell you what's wrong so that you can improve. I hate people who say they're there for you, but then just go away, tho the varrious forms of communication in this day and age, and I hate girls that cheat on guys, or treat the good guys like crap for no good damn reason, then try to keep them on a leash to statisfy their own selfish emotions only to drop them like their nothing, like a mom leaving her newborn baby in the trash. Seriously...life today...what is wrong with you people.